Friday, December 25, 2009

Top 112 Reasons JJ Abrams "Star Trek" Movie SUCKS!

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1) If the Romulans knew a super nova was coming, why didn't they evacuate the planet? It takes months for super nova's to blow. They had PLENTY of time. And why did it take so long for the Vulcans to come up with the red matter solution?
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2) Let's say that Spock's plan worked. He gets the red matter and fires it at the Romulan sun that's about to nova. It works! The sun is sucked into a black hole. Mission accomplished. But now the Romulan solar system has no sun, therefore no warmth, which would cause Romulas to turn into an ice planet. Everyone freezes to death because Abrams' Romulan's are too stupid to evacuate when disaster is coming. Who does Nero blame now?
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3) The movie opens with the Kelvin encountering Nero's ship. Both ships are right next to a sun. Why arent they incinerated?
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4) Nero, his crew, and ship are from the same "TNG" 24th century we all know. So how come his ship has weapons that fire with shrapnel debris? This seems like really primitive and inconsistent weapondry for a 24th century ship. Especially since we never saw any Romulan weapons like this on TNG, DS9, or Voyager.
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5) The Kelvin captain Robau orders phasers to be fired on Nero's ship. When phasers are fired, why can we hear sound of the phaser guns firing on the bridge? Are they that loud outside the ship?
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6) The Kelvin crew has the technology to monitor their captain's vital signs while he's on Nero's ship. This technology didn't even exist on the original series. How can they have that technology when the interior of the Kelvin looks like a rust refinery?
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7) Are we honestly supposed to believe that Nero and his crew waited 25 years to avenge himself on Spock? Wouldn't they be bored shitless just waiting in space for 2 1/2 decades? Why not live their lives on Romulas of that time period and maybe warn Romulas about the future supernova? Or use the red matter to go into the future, a month or so before the nova happened, and make sure Romulas evacuates. Also, how come Nero and his crew never aged in the 25 years he just sat in space and waited?
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8) So. . .the engineering deck of the Enterprise looks like a. . .20th century brewery??? Wow. That's certainly an innovative science fiction concept. Since they never mentioned dilithium crystals, I'm guessing the engines run on. . .gasoline?
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9) How come McCoy doesn't have a southern accent?
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10) Nero said the Federation sat by and did nothing about the Super nova. Romulas has never exactly been an olive branch of peace with the Federation. But, in this film, the Romulans did contact the Vulcans, who agreed to help. And Vulcan's are members of the Federation. So, technically, the Federation DID help.

11) The Centurion Slugs aren't terribly original. They enter through the mouth like the "Conspiracy" creatures of TNG and make a person tell the truth like Khan's Ceti eels.

12) Exactly what purpose did that car chase seen have with ANYTHING in the movie? Could young Kirk even reach the pedals at that age? And since the police android's cycle hovers, why didn't it hover over the side of the cliff and help Kirk back to safety instead of just watching him climb back up all by himself? Also, when young Kirk's car falls into the "Grand Canyon" of Iowa, it crashes below, but that crappy Beastie Boys "music" can still be heard playing even after the car has crashed.

13) Nero's ship is significantly huge compared to the Kelvin. So why didn't Nero just destroy it? Nero destroyed the attacking Starships around Vulcan and the armada of 47 ships Klingon ships from Rura Penthe. So how come Nero couldn't destroy the Kelvin, which was one mere single small ship? He just sits there and lets the Kelvin ram into his ship. Not to mention letting all the escape pods fly to their freedom.

14) The Kelvin has over 800 passengers when the Enterprise (a larger starship) has 430? And why are there families aboard it? Families aboard starships never happened until The Next Generation.

15) The Kelvin is a 23rd century spaceship. Are we honestly supposed to believe that the inside of a 23rd century space ship looks like a 20th century metal refinery??? That's like saying that the inside of an iPod looks like the inside of a Victrola.

16) Product placement. Young Kirk's Nokia phone in his car. Uhura ordering a Budweiser. They don't have competing companies in the Federation! The Federation provides everything anyone ever wants. There are no brand names! Also, cell phones are going to be really obsolete in the 23rd century! Cell towers won't even exist!!!

17) When Sulu comes aboard, he is assigned to the helm position on the bridge. On the original series, Sulu's first position was mathematician. Did the Sulu in this universe not get a degree in mathematics?

18) The Kobioshi-Maru scenario. Since "The Wrath of Khan", we always got the impression that this test was named after the two people who designed it. A person with the last name Kobioshi and a person with the last name Maru. But in this movie, this particular test was designed by. . .Spock? Why is it called Kobioshi-Maru if Spock designed it???

19) How come technicians and instructors can be seen through windows on the Kobioshi-Maru "bridge"? Isn't this rather intimidating to have teachers watch you in this situation? No wonder everyone fails!

20) How come no one is busting Kirk for eating an apple during the Kobioshi-Maru test? In fact, has anyone in the entire history of film ever looked more like a bufoon eating an apple than Chris Pine?

21) An entire assembly of cadets are amassed when Kirk is brought forth to answer the code of conduct over his tampering with the Kobioshi-Maru. Uhm. Shouldn't this be handled in closed quarters? This should be a private matter. Why assemble all cadets for this???

22) Most Star Trek movies have a certain amount of dry humor. In Star Trek IV, the humor flowed naturally. Abram's Star Trek has so much forced humor, it just leaves your jaw dropped as to why anyone would think certain things are funny. McCoy constantly giving painful shots to Kirk (why are they painful???). Kirk's hand inflating. These elements are as funny as stubbing ones toe.

23) Why did McCoy have to inject Kirk with meds that gave him false symptoms to get him aboard the Enterprise? Why not just throw some water on his face to fake sweat and have him pretend to be sick? I mean, who's going to know he's faking? McCoy's the only doctor around until they get to the Enterprise.

24) Kirk calls McCoy "Bones" all the time, but McCoy never asks Kirk why he calls him that. McCoy probably didn't even remember his casual remark about his ex-wife leaving him nothing but his bones. That also is the lamest reason as to why McCoy is called "Bones".

25) When Spock was a young boy, he gets taunted and in a fight with 3 other Vulcan boys. Why would they start this fight in the middle of a learning center with witnesses around? Why not go outside to a recess area? Do they WANT to get caught? This is not logical.

26) One of the Vulcan bullies refers to Spock's mother as a whore. Doesn't it seem odd that the word "whore" would even be in the Vulcan vocabulary? Especially since Vulcans aren't known for name-calling. Granted these are young bullies, but they are accusing Spock of having emotion, when they themselves are using insults like an emotional human would. Pot calling the kettle black.

27) When young Kirk is joy-riding with the sports car, he yells hello to his brother Johnny on the side of the road. Kirk's brother was named Sam. Not Johnny. Since all other characters in this film have the correct names, why change Kirk's brother's name?

28) The Enterprise's red alert sounds like a cheap video game.

29) Why does Sarek, a Vulcan, have a British accent? One of Nero's men has a British accent as well. This is a first in Star Trek history. That's bloody stupid.
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30) Why does Chekov address the ship to update their current status? Shouldn't the captain do this? On the original series it was Pike or Kirk who always addressed the ship through the Intercraft speakers. Plus, with his strong (and obviously fake) accent, will everyone understand him? I mean, the computer can't even understand him!

31) Kirk recognises the lightning storm as being a factor in Nero's ship, relating it back to when Kirk was born and the Kelvin's encounter. Since Kirk was an infant at that time, would he really remember details like that? Wouldn't it make more sense for Pike to put those facts together? I mean, Pike was a crew member of the Kelvin then. You'd think he'd have a more vivid recollection of those events than the infant Kirk who only read a report as to the fate of the Kelvin.

32) Uhura goes into a bar by herself and orders several drinks. Is she going to drink them all by herself? Cause ain't nobody with her. Kirk even points this out, but no answer is given. Also, one of the drinks she orders is a Cardassian Sunrise. The Cardassian race was never seen on the original series. Probably because Starfleet had not ventured out to Cardassian space as yet. Are we to believe that this alternate universe, with ships that have water treatment plants as engineering decks, can venture further out in space than the TOS crew did? I think not.

33) What purpose was served by Kirk getting in a bar fight? It had absolutely NOTHING to do with the rest of the film. Also, it's obvious they cast Chris Pine in the role of Kirk for eye candy for the ladies. But do women really want to see a good-looking guy with a beaten and scarred face? Because that's what Pine looks like for the rest of this film. I guess healing wounds are somehow sexy?

34) Nero's ship is a mining ship. But why does this drill have to be activated from orbit? This is rather impractical. Wouldn't they get more precise if they were closer to the target? Like near the surface of the planet? I mean, there's a reason that regular shop drill bits are only 3 inches long instead of 3 feet long, right? And wouldn't it burn up in the atmosphere?

35) How come Pike doesn't have the traditional Star Trek 'pointy' sideburns? Spock does. Sulu does. Kirk sort-of does. Even some of the female crew do. But Pike doesn't.

36) If Nero is such a hateful, revenge-filled person, why does he greet the Enterprise with a polite "Hello"? He also says a polite "Hi Christopher. I'm Nero" to Pike. Is this the best take they had from Bana saying "Hello" or "Hi Christopher"? Or did the filmmakers just not care? I'm guessing the latter since it's clear no one cared what they were writing in this pathetic film.

37) How is it that Nero's ship's drill blocks communications and transporters from the Enterprise? All this drill does is make big holes by shooting fire (and nothing drills holes in planetary surfaces better than fire, right?). How would fire interfere with communications and transporters? And this interference suddenly ends when Kirk & Sulu blast the drill. Doesn't it seem odd that the base of the drill would be the source of interference? All that thing does is shoot fire. Wouldn't it make more sense for Nero's ship to be the source for any type of electronic interference?

38) When Kirk and Sulu air-jump to the drill, Chekov refers to them as an "away team". On the original series, they were referred to as a "landing party". They weren't refered to as an "away team" until The Next Generation, EIGHTY YEARS LATER.

39) When Kirk and Sulu land on the base of the drill, how is it that two of Nero's crew just happen to be there? And how did they get there? They were inside these little hatches. This drill shoots fire. You'd think they'd be incinerated if they were inside this thing. Also, how come one of the Romulans that attacks them has a goatee? No Romulan has ever had ANY facial hair on the original series, The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, Voyager, or Enterprise.

40) The Chief Medical Officer on the Enterprise was Dr. Puri, until he was killed. On the original series, Dr. Boyce was the chief doctor on Pike's Enterprise. And Dr. McCoy replaced Dr. Piper, who was doctor in Kirk's early days. So who the hell is Dr. Puri??? Couldn't the writers have been a little consistent and used the name Boyce or Piper instead of just making up some generic name?

41) Let's count the times that Kirk is left dangling from some type of precipice. 1) Young Kirk dangles from a cliff when his car went into the "quarry". 2) Kirk dangles from Nero's drill as a Romulan tries to step on his hands. 3) Towards the end of the film, Kirk dangles from a platform inside Nero's ship. What's with this? Is Abram's as crazy about cliffhangers as he is about his incredibly annoying lens flares?

42) It doesn't give me much hope if people are still listening to the Beastie Boys in the 23rd century. How about a more timeless group like The Beatles, Rolling Stones, or Led Zeppelin? At least a group that has already been enjoyed by multi-generations. The Beastie Boys hardly qualify. And why would young Kirk care about a 300 year old music group? I mean, how many modern day teenagers crank Bill Haley and the Comets in their cars?

43) Chekov realizes that he can save a falling Kirk and Sulu, so he gets up and leaves the bridge. We next see him on another deck, running through the halls towards the transporter room. No where do we see Chekov take the turbo lift to the other deck. And he has to! So, logically, by the time it takes Chekov to run out off the bridge, take the turbo lift, run through the halls of the next deck, then work out the coordinance to beam them up, Kirk and Sulu would have long since fallen to their deaths. Gravity has a way of working very quickly.

44) Why didn't they transport Amanda? She was locked in the transporter beam the transportation process had started. Which means she was not subject to gravity anymore. So why did she fall?

45) Why is Chekov still in the transporter room when Spock's mother is attempting to beam up? Shouldn't he have gone back to the bridge? But since he is there, how come he couldn't save Amanda from dying? He saved Kirk and Sulu from falling. And how did Chekov even know it was Amanda who fell? When she falls, Chekov yells "I'm loosing her!". How does he even know the person who fell was female? The original series didn't even have that technology. So how could a ship that has a brewery for an engine room have that technology?

46) Nero tells Pike that Spock did nothing to help save Romulas. Uhm. Spock was in the Romulan system with a ship containing red matter: the stuff that was supposed to save Romulas. Nero captures Spock's ship to confirm this. Why else would Spock have the red matter with him? This PROVES that he was TRYING TO HELP. How freaking stupid is Nero???

47) Nero says he going to destroy all the remaining Federation planets. Hmm. Does Nero know how many freaking planets there are in the Federation? This could take a mighty long time. Could there be a more pointlessly written character in all of motion picture history? Idiots out there compare this movie to" The Wrath of Khan". Khan was such a complex character that he's almost Shakesperian in his history, method, and motivation. Nero is not complex. He's certainly not Shakesperian. He's just pointless. He's an incredibly stupid bully. That's it.

48) How come none of the phaser pistols have any distinctive beam to them? They seem more like energy pulses than actual laser beam type. Does JJ Abrams not know what a phaser is? And why are they silver in color? What is this? The 50's?

49) The new warp speed effect seems to have the same effect as the phaser pistols do. Instead of the cool striping and rainbow swooshes we expect, these ships just disappear from sight with a little popping sound. Gee. That's so impressive. Saves money on effects, I suppose. But it really lacks imagination. Or originality since their light speed effect mimics Star Wars light speed effects.

50) Iowa is a completely flat landscape state. No mountains and certainly no massive canyons that young Kirk crashed his car into. Do the writers of this film know anything about geography??? There are no canyons in Iowa!!! The producers of this film say that it's a quarry. Are rock quarries usually as deep as the Grand Canyon?

51) Please explain to me why the Enterprise is being built in a cornfield! And how did it get into space??? In "A Peice of the Action", Kirk said "The ship can't land", because it has to landing struts. So what prevents this thing from tipping over when this ship is released from it's docking clamps? You'll notice this was never shown in the film.

52) Uhura's academy room mate is a green Orion slave girl. How did a slave girl end up in Starfleet Academy? Would a slave from Orion have an education or even a desire to explore space? She also seems really friendly, outspoken, and outgoing. Are these usually the qualities of a slave?

53) Why does Chekov have such a thick (and obviously fake) Russian accent? Where is his traditional Davey Jones hairstyle? And why is he such a techno mastermind? He was never this extravagant on TOS. He was just a good navigator. Also, why was he only 17 years old? According to TOS, Chekov was 12 years younger than Kirk. And why didn't he have any "this was inwented in Russia" jokes?

54) When Spock uses the transporter to beam to Vulcan to rescue the Vulcan elders and his parents, he gets on the transporter platform and kneels down on the pad. Why is he kneeling? He's transporting to the surface of a planet, not some cramped building or structure.

55) Spock & Uhura. Hmm. Let's see here. Spock had his emotions in check before arriving on the Enterprise. In fact, they were in check until Kirk got him angry. So where did this emotion of love, lust, or whatever come from when he becomes lovers with Uhura? I mean, Spock & Uhura??? WTF?! Who's the idiot who thought that up??? Uhura is a young sexy woman. Does she know Vulcans only mate every 7 years? Good luck with that one, Nyota.

56) This new Enterprise bridge is beyond boring. Even the interior hallways. They are all white. Could they have been more cliche to science fiction? Star Wars, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Alien, Space: 1999. These productions all have white interiors. This bridge looks like an iPod store. It's unfamiliar, uncomfortable, antiseptic, and generic. And what's the deal with those transparent partitions? If you need to address an officer from a distance, they have to lean around these stupid partitions in order to see and hear them properly.

57) Chekov wasn't on the first season of TOS, but Janice Rand and Nurse Chapel were. Where were they in this movie? In fact, where was Gary Mitchell, Ben Finny, Finnigan, Ruth, Janis Wallace, or Carol Marcus?

58) Why are the Romulans all bald with facial tattoos? This is never explained. Are these what all Romulans look like according to JJ Abrams? The design of the tattoos are what we call "Tribal" design in earth of 2009. Why are humanoid aliens from the 24th century using a fad symbol from 2009 earth? These Romulans were from the same Star Trek 24th century we're all familiar with. A time where Romulans, like Klingons, have ridged foreheads. So, why doesn't Nero or his crew have prosthetic foreheads?
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59) A small pea-sized drop of Red Matter can cause a black hole. At the end of the movie, the entire mother lode of Red Matter makes a black hole and swallows Nero's ship. But the black hole it creates is the same size as as other singularities it previously created with a pea-sized amount. If a pea-sized amount would swallow a planet, wouldn't a HUGE amount of cause a black hole big enough to swallow an entire galaxy?

60) Everyone in this movie refers to a singularity as a "black hole". But in Star Trek: The Motion Picture, Decker refers to black holes as what they USED to be called. So why do people in this universe call singularities "black holes"?

61) We see Romulas destroyed. But what happened to it's sister planet Remus, which is right next to Romulas in proximity. Remus was featured prominently in Star Trek: Nemesis. Where is Remus in this film?

62) Could the new Enterprise's engines be more thick and bulky? Jeez. Who's the brain trust who designed this thing? Talk about a lop-sided ship. Both Gene Roddenberry and Matt Jeffries are spinning in their graves over this alone.

63) In interrogating Pike, Nero wants to know the subspace frequencies of Starfleet's boarder protection grids. In Nero's time (the 24th century), 23rd century subspace frequencies would be obsolete. You'd think Nero would be able to easily find these codes by simply accessing his 24th century computer. In Star Trek: The Motion Picture, Uhura accessed the old NASA codes to activate the Voyager probe.

64) At one point, Spock gets tired of Kirk's disobedience and ejects him off the Enterprise. Uhm. Is it really wise for a Starfleet captain to just eject your First Officer onto an unsafe and frozen planet? Why not just throw him in the BRIG???!!! I think Spock was 'emotionally compromised right then and there.

65) Spock gives Kirk a neck pinch to imobolize him. But it's filmed from an angle that you don't really see exactly what he's doing. People watching this film, who aren't familiar with Star Trek, might not understand what exactly happened.

66) On the original series episode "Where No Man Has Gone Before", Delta Vega was an empty desert planet full of rocks, dust, and a dilithium cracking station. In this film, Delta Vega is an ICE PLANET!!! WTF???!!! When did THIS happen??? And where is the dilethium station???!!! Also, Delta Vega wasn't anywhere near the Vuclan system. Even Nero's tampering with events couldn't have moved an entire planet's place in the galaxy.

67) After landing on Delta Vega, Kirk is in his pod where the computer tells him where he is and that the planet is "Class M Planet. Unsafe". First off, Class M planets are earth-type. Therefore it would be completely safe. But even if the planet was "unsafe", shouldn't the computer give a little better description? Like give the temperature or say if it's a volcanic or oceanic terrain? "Unsafe" doesn't tell me much.

68) On Delta Vega, Kirk is chased by an ice monster that looks like a cross between a vagina and the Cloverfield monster. This monster also has no fur, but skin. How messed up is the evolution on this planet to give no fur to a creature on an ice planet? With no fur, such a creature would freeze instantly with only bare skin to protect it.

69) Kirk first sees a large-fanged furry creature running towards him. This creature is then attacked by the large Cloverfield monster that soon spits out the furry creature to chase Kirk. The furry creature is larger than Kirk, therefore it would have more meat on it than Kirk does. Why would the Cloverfield monster choose less meat for it's meal?

70) The Cloverfield monster chases Kirk into a cave where Elder Spock is there to scare off this monster with. . .a torch? A mere torch is all it takes to scare this monster off, eh?
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71) Nero strands Spock on Delta Vega so he could watch planet Vulcan get destroyed and feel the pain and anguish Nero felt when Romulas was destroyed. But Delta Vega is an ice planet! Which means it snows a lot. Which means it's probably cloudy most of the time. Which means Spock might not be able to see Vulcan get destroyed in space! Even if there were no clouds, Nero would have to wait until nightfall before Spock could see anything happening in space. Also, doesn't Nero know that Vulcans are unemotional? A Vulcan might not react like an emotional Romulan would.

72) Elder Spock tells Kirk that in the future "a star will explode and threaten to destroy the galaxy". Destroy the GALAXY??? Suns nova all the time in the Universe and they never destroy galaxies in the process. They only destroy the planets in their system. Galaxies are rather large. Too bad the writers of this stupid film don't know simple facts like this.

73) During the mind meld with Kirk, Elder Spock says that when he arrived in the Romulan system, he was too late and the nova destroyed Romulas. He then said "I had little time. I had to extract the red matter and shoot it into the super nova". Uhm. If Romulas has already been destroyed, why even bother using the red matter?! He had little time for WHAT?


74) This new transporter effect is just plain stupid. I mean, why an energy swirl? WTF? Converting matter to energy was perfectly demonstrated by the transporter effect on TOS. A "Slinky" effect hardly qualifies.

75) When Kirk and Elder Spock meet Scotty, he has a Tribble with him. First off, what is a Tribble doing on an ice planet? But more importantly, how is it that this Tribble has not multiplied? You'd think Spock would at least ask these questions.
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76) Kirk and Scotty are transwarp-beamed onto the Enterprise. Scotty materializes inside a
water pipe. Uhm. Why isn't Scotty killed instantly since his molecules are infused with water?
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77) When Kirk opens the valve and releases Scotty from the water tube, Scotty falls a good 12 feet onto a solid hard floor. Uh. How did Scotty survive this fall without getting at least a broken arm or leg?

78) The Kelvin's instruments could monitor Captain's Robau's vital signs while he was away on Nero's ship. Chekov can tell Amanda is a female when she's in the transporter beam. So how is it that when Kirk and Scotty transwarp-beam onto the Enterprise, no one even monitors as much as a blip to indicate that someone has beamed onto the ship? You'd think intruder alerts would be going off or something!

79) When Vulcan is being destroyed, why does Spock try and save the Vulcan elders? Wouldn't it make more sense to save the children and younger Vulcans? After all, this is genocide! Why not save those who are capable of having children?

80) Elder Spock recognizes young Kirk immediately. But how come he doesn't ask why Kirk's eyes are blue? They were brown on TOS. It was Dr. McCoy's eyes that were blue on TOS. In this film, McCoy's eyes are brown. Nero's actions could not change eye color. We're talking genetics here.

81) Elder Spock doesn't seem like Spock. He seems more like Leonard Nimoy. His attitude and verbage are more quirky than subtle. I guess Nimoy hadn't played the part in a while. It's almost like Nimoy did this movie for a quick paycheck.

82) In TOS's Starfleet Academy, Kirk was a "stack of books with legs" teacher. Then, Kirk was assigned to the USS Farragut. How does this new Kirk go from a student who was grounded, to Starship commander only a few scenes later? He may be smart and resourceful, BUT HE'S NOT EXPERIENCED!!! One space adventure and a mere 3 years at the Academy hardly qualifies! Also, he's an obnoxious asshole! He's got some learning and growing up to do first! If this Kirk encountered Charles Evans now, Kirk couldn't help him get through adolescence, cause Kirk has barely passed it himself!

83) Why is Scotty such a squirly guy? He just does NOT seem like James Doohan's Scotty we all know. And he certianly doesn't sound like Scotty. He sounds more like a British guy trying to imitate a Scottish accent. Oh wait. That's exactly what Simon Pegg is doing.
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84) What is with that annoying little creature with Scotty? Couldn't they have left him on the ice planet? Get rid of the Ewok! It serves ZERO purpose! We don't need Scrappy Doo in Star Trek!

85) When Kirk provokes Spock to attack him on the bridge, shouldn't Uhura step in to intervene? She just stands there gasping. It's actually Sarek that intervenes. Why is Sarek on the bridge? It would make more sense that Spock's mate Uhura be the one to stop the fight.

86) After Sarek stops Spock from killing Kirk, Spock relinquishing his command to Kirk and walks out of the bridge where he and Sarek have a heart to heart talk in the. . .TRANSPORTER ROOM? Wouldn't Spock's quarters be a better place than a room any engineer could wander into?

87) Scotty mentions an experiment he tried with Admiral Archer's dog. Uhm. Wouldn't Archer be dead since this movie takes place 150 years after the events in Star Trek: Enterprise"? Do the writers of this film not know the time line?

88) When the Enterprise crew first sees Nero, how come they don't act surprised at seeing a Romulan for the first time? They certainly were all surprised in "Balance of Terror".

89) When Nero is fighting Kirk, he tells him that he recognizes him from Earth history. He then says he will deprive Kirk of his life like he did Kirk's father. Uhm. How did Nero know Kirk's father took command of the Kelvin?

90) When Nero is interrogating Captain Pike on his ship, why is Nero walking in 3 feet of water? Where did this water come from? And what the hell is it doing on a space ship?

91) Elder Spock is insistent that Kirk not tell younger Spock of Elder's Spock's existence. Then, at film's end, Elder Spock meets younger Spock anyway!!!

92) Did Pike ever get rid of those Centurion Slugs? This is never explained. And why is he in a wheel chair? I wasn't aware of his legs being injured by his Nero ordeal.

93) Kirk asks for more power from Scotty to escape the black hole that the Enterprise and Nero's ship is getting sucked into. Scotty gives the traditional line of "I'm givin' 'er all she's got, Cap'n". On the original series, Scotty would be standing at an engineering station, working buttons and watching monitors and actually looking like he's doing something. This new Scotty is walking aimlessly around the brewery-- oops. I'm sorry. I mean, the "engineering" deck. Isn't there a control panel he could be working at or crawling in a Jeffrey's Tube to make it look like he's actually "giving her all she's got"?

94) Scotty suggests ejecting the warp core to escape the black hole (I'm not sure how ejecting the warp core would do anything). When he ejects it, there are SEVERAL cores that eject. Isn't there just one warp core?
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95) Nero abandons Spock on the ice planet so Spock can witness Nero destroying Vulcan, which would cause Spock to live with that painful sight the rest of his life. Spock has already lived a long life. And he doesn't want to see Vulcan destroyed. So why doesn't Spock just step outside his cave one frozen night until he freezes? Then he wouldn't have to live with that memory or with the lack of hope of being rescued? I guess Nero and the writers never thought of that.

96) When Spock beams down to rescue his parents and the Vulcan elders, Spock goes in the caves and comes upon Sarek, Amanda, and the elders all joined hands in a circle around some stone carving, as if they are in some religious ceremony. Vulcans, being a logical race, do not believe in mythology like deities or religion. So exactly what are these Vulcans doing?

97) This new alternate Spock shows his emotions so easily (his mother dying, kissing Uhura, attacking Kirk) that it's impossible for the viewer to see him as a genuine Spock character. For instance, if this Spock were to break down and cry in "The Naked Time", it wouldn't be as poignant. Because we'd be expecting him to do it. You honestly believed that Nimoy's Spock was struggling between his two halves, but Quinto's Spock is too emotionally predictable. And not nearly as interesting.

98) Elder Spock tells Scotty about Scotty's theory involving transwarp beaming. Scotty acknowledges this. But since Spock mentions this, it means that the Scotty Spock knew from his timeline would have thought of the same theory. On the original series episode "Day of the Dove", Kirk suggests intra-ship beaming, from one deck to another. Spock says it's rarely been done because of the danger of materializing into a wall or a table. If the original Scotty conceived the theory of transwarp beaming someone onto a starship going warp speed, you'd think he would have overcame the equation of mere intra-ship beaming on TOS.

99) The bully that attacks Kirk in the bar. He's not Uhura's boyfriend. He's not related to Uhura. And there's nothing to indicate that he even knows her. So why is he even picking a fight with Kirk?

100) Pike isn't looking for Kirk when he walks into the bar, but somehow he knows Kirk scored high on his aptitude test. How did he know this? If Pike knows Kirk has potential, why hasn't he actually sought him out and pimped Starfleet to him before this?

101) Pike refers to Starfleet as a "peacekeeping and humanatarian armada". What a horrible and inaccurate description of Starfleet. That's kinda like saying peacekeeper missiles.

102) Why is McCoy entering Starfleet at age 34? Though never stated on the original series, I always got the impression that McCoy was in Starfleet most of his life.

103) On the original series, Pike was Captain of the Enterprise for 11 years before Kirk became captain. In this movie, Pike is captain for. . .a couple of hours. Nero's time interference couldn't have effected the time line so abruptly to offset that history.

104) Why is it that the Enterprise or the Kelvin didn't have seat belts, but the shuttle that Kirk took to the academy had very pronounced (and very 20th century) seatbelts for it's passengers?

105) On the shuttle that Kirk and McCoy take to the academy, McCoy tells Kirk "one tiny crack in the hull and our blood boils in 13 seconds. Solar flare might crop up and cook us in our seats.". Uhm. This shuttle isn't going into space. It's just going from Iowa to San Francisco. If the hull cracked open, it might get a bit windy in there, but that's it.

106) The red matter and it's containment system are Vulcan devices on elder Spock's ship. How is it that Nero's ship has a deployment system perfectly fitted to the specifications of the red matter containment module used to deploy the matter to the planet? Maybe that's what Nero's crew did for 25 years: make a red matter deployment system.

107) Nero tells Pike that Nero prevented genocide. But destroying Vulcan won't stop the Romulan sun going supernova in the future.

108) When Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman wrote this movie, they must never have seen the original series. Because most of the references in this movie are from the films. From Star Trek: The Motion Picture, they mentioned the Kolinar discipline and the camera angles of the first viewing of the Enterprise. The Kobioshi/Maru from Star Trek II. Warp speed failing while trying to leave space dock from Star Trek III. Nero's drill attacking near the Golden Gate bridge like the whale probe ionizing the oceans near the same bridge from Star Trek IV. Kirk banging his head on the support beam on the academy shuttle he boards, mimicking the scene of Scotty banging his head on the bulkhead in Star Trek V. And Spock saying the line "If you iliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth" from Star Trek VI. It looks like these writers just watched the first 6 movies and called that research.

110) The sound effect of the Kelvin's phasers and the Enterprise's phasers is the same. You'd think it would change in 25 years. On the original series, the phaser sound effect and phaser beam of the Constitution class Enterprise was totally different from the refitted Enterprise in Star Trek: The Motion Picture and the Enterprise-A. But then, the industrial areas of Abram's starships look like 20th century brewerys and metal foundries. So technological advancement is pretty lopsided in his universe.

111) J.J. Abrams likes lens flares. Most directors and the general public hate lens flares because they are annoying. They certainly are in this movie. And talk about overkill. Does every frame of this movie HAVE to have lens flares?! It's almost like Abrams thinks this film is so awesome that it just sparkles and glares like a diamond so much it causes lens flares. Jimi Hendrix turned feedback into musical art. Abrams' did NOT do the same with lens flares. I have a suggestion for Mr. Abrams. In the sequel, he should go out of his way to show reflections in mirrors and windows of the production crew doing their jobs making the movie. Maybe also show boom mikes coming into frame on purpose? Why not be as unprofessional as possible?

112) One of the deleted scenes of this movie takes place after the first scene in the movie. After the Kelvin is rammed into Nero's ship, Klingons take over his ship and take Nero and crew to the Klingon prison planet Rura Penthe. For some reason, these Klingons wait 25 years until they interrogate Nero and try to force the slugs down his throat. When they do, Nero beats these Klingons up and releases his crew. Okay. Aren't there other Klingons that could stop Nero from escaping??? This is a prison planet, after all. Secondly, how would Nero and crew get off the planet? As we saw in Star Trek VI, an energy shield prevents beaming off the planet. Lastly, even if they could beam off, why would Nero's ship be in orbit of Raura Penthe? You'd think the Klingons would take the ship back to the Klingon home world as a trophy 25 years ago. Again, too many holes for these shitty writers. No wonder they deleted this scene.


113) Months before this movie came out, a teaser trailer was released that showed close-ups of the Enterprise being built. Some of which were shots of men firing up welding arcs. Are we supposed to believe that a 23rd century spaceship is held together by 20th century welding technology? Has JJ Abrams ever heard of a phaser?

114) Since day one, Star Trek has ALWAYS been about morality plays. In TOS's "Devil In the Dark", we learn that the horrible monster is actually a protectant mother. In TNG's "Best of Both Worlds", we learn the difficulty of making big tough decisions. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan" starts with the struggle of growing old and ends by showing the futility of a quest for vengeance. What morality lesson do we learn in this movie? The futility of a quest for vengeance? Been done, ad nauseam, in Star Trek (as has time travel). Please explain what the morality lesson was in this movie. I'd love to hear it. Because, to me, the lesson is that the movie-going public likes explosions and zero plot.